busy... too busy. tomorrow am going to pangasinan. i'll be too busy... and too far from my laptop 9nope, won't be bringing it with me.)

busy... too busy... till then...

read on...

i think the worst will soon come upon me. my mother is giving me the biggest fright of my life.

she'd often go out in the morning and come home late at night [if not very late] carrying a stack of foods.

think that's not frightening? think again, mate!

today, she went out again. earlier, before she decided she'd go out, i heard her talking over the phone. i asked her before she left for her 'date' where she's headed and what's up with it? she says "blah blah blah" if you know what i mean.

then, she comes home at 7:00 pm, 'carrying a stack of foods'. when asked where she went to, i got the same reply.

as she falls asleep, i rummaged through her bag.

and there's just too many things inside there that she wouldn't be carrying if the situation hadn't changed.

my suspicion just grows bigger everyday. and it's eating me up alive. my conscience is bugging me! "hey! that's your mother! how could you!"

and the fear continues to eat up my whole system; tearing apart what's left of my sanity.

but, one thing for sure, i will not be pacified with a 'stack of foods'! soon, i will choke the truth out of her. she's been doing this for 'heaven-knows-when'! and i just hate it! i wish she'd just let go of everything that has happened in out lives. i know this is easier said than done, but to take the first step would be easy.